Praise the Lord.. seriously.. He has been so gracious in helping me with that!
Today I read Genesis 43-45. It is the story of Joseph seeing his brothers again for the first time he was sold into slavery in Egypt. One of my favorite part comes in chapter 25:
"And now do not be distressed or angry with yourselves because you sold me here, for God sent me before you to preserve life. For the famine has been in the land these two years, and there are yet five years in which there will be neither plowing nor harvest. And God sent me before you to preserve for you a remnant on earth, and to keep alive for you many survivors. So it was not you who sent me here, but God." - verses 5-8aThree times, Joseph gives them grace by saying "Listen, brothers, don't blame yourselves -- you didn't send me here, GOD did." This truly was grace for them to hear it, but also, wow, it shows God's grace that He opened Joseph's eyes to see His plan and His sovereignty.
How many times do I forget that it wasn't such-and-such of a circumstance that got me here, but it was God's sovereignty? Yeah, a year of lots of random happenings, some painful, a lot joyful, but all grace-filled, beautiful examples of God's sovereignty.
I still feel like I'm in the thick of it. I still have no idea where this crazy plan God has is going to take me. But I have to keep reminding myself:
God sent me here.